Last Call Review of draft-cotton-rfc4020bis-01
review-cotton-rfc4020bis-01-genart-lc-sparks-2013-09-12-00
| Request | Review of | draft-cotton-rfc4020bis |
|---|---|---|
| Requested revision | No specific revision (document currently at 02) | |
| Type | Last Call Review | |
| Team | General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) (genart) | |
| Deadline | 2013-09-24 | |
| Requested | 2013-08-29 | |
| Authors | Michelle Cotton | |
| Draft last updated | 2013-09-12 | |
| Completed reviews |
Genart Last Call review of -01
by
Robert Sparks
(diff)
Genart Telechat review of -02 by Robert Sparks Secdir Last Call review of -01 by Tero Kivinen (diff) |
|
| Assignment | Reviewer | Robert Sparks |
| State | Completed Snapshot | |
| Review |
review-cotton-rfc4020bis-01-genart-lc-sparks-2013-09-12
|
|
| Reviewed revision | 01 (document currently at 02) | |
| Result | On the Right Track | |
| Completed | 2013-09-12 |
review-cotton-rfc4020bis-01-genart-lc-sparks-2013-09-12-00
I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. For background on
Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at
<http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>
.
Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments
you may receive.
Document: draft-cotton-rfc4020bis-01
Reviewer: Robert Sparks
Review Date: 2013-09-11
IETF LC End Date: 2013-09-24
IESG Telechat date: not scheduled
Summary:
This draft is on the right track but has open issues, described in
the review.
(That summary was taken from the options in RFC6385. I would prefer
to say
"There is one minor issue that is bigger than a nit, but it should
be easy to straighten out")
Issue : Section 2 is very confusing. It starts out listing 4 things
that look like they all have to be met. But then the last sentence
confuses things. Is just reinforcing that both a and b have to be
met (if so, then wouldn't things also stop if c and d weren't met?
(see 3.1 step2)).
I suggest replacing "If conditions (a) or (b)" with "If any of the
above conditions"
Nit 1: Section 3.1 reads harshly at the transition from step 4 to
step 5. It leaves it implicit that the AD has to approve.
Step 3 has "if steps 2 and 3 are satisfied". 4020 said "with the
approval of the Area Director(s)". Adding that text to step 5 would
address the nit.
Nit 2: The introduction contains a bit of text that it carried
forward, slightly modified, from 4020 for which I suggest further
modification:
replace
"the IETF community wishes to retain tight control of the protocol"
with
"the IETF community has consensus to retain tight control of the
registry content"
That way this document is reflecting the actual process point that
would lead to a tighter registration policy without trying to
speculate what motivated that consensus.
Nit 3: Several reviewers have pointed to a lack of clarity in
section 2 a.
I suggest taking the change John Klensin proposed (with tweaks as
below)
The code points must normally be from a space designated
as "RFC Required", "IETF Review", or "Standards Action".
In addition, code points from a "Specification
Required" space are allowed if the specification will be
published as an RFC.