Last Call Review of draft-ietf-detnet-ip-over-mpls-05
review-ietf-detnet-ip-over-mpls-05-genart-lc-evens-2020-04-20-00

Request Review of draft-ietf-detnet-ip-over-mpls
Requested revision No specific revision (document currently at 09)
Type IETF Last Call Review
Team General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) (genart)
Deadline 2020-04-23
Requested 2020-04-09
Authors Balazs Varga , Lou Berger , Don Fedyk , Stewart Bryant , Jouni Korhonen
I-D last updated 2021-10-04 (Latest revision 2020-10-11)
Completed reviews Rtgdir IETF Last Call review of -04 by Tomonori Takeda (diff)
Genart IETF Last Call review of -05 by Tim Evens (diff)
Secdir IETF Last Call review of -07 by Vincent Roca (diff)
Tsvart IETF Last Call review of -05 by Brian Trammell (diff)
Assignment Reviewer Tim Evens
State Completed
Request IETF Last Call review on draft-ietf-detnet-ip-over-mpls by General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) Assigned
Posted at https://mailarchive.ietf.org/arch/msg/gen-art/y4N9ORyUOImqgWZ3UeBN2LfD_WQ
Reviewed revision 05 (document currently at 09)
Result Ready w/nits
Completed 2020-04-20
review-ietf-detnet-ip-over-mpls-05-genart-lc-evens-2020-04-20-00
I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at

<https://trac.ietf.org/trac/gen/wiki/GenArtfaq>.

Document: draft-ietf-detnet-ip-over-mpls-??
Reviewer: Tim Evens
Review Date: 2020-04-20
IETF LC End Date: 2020-04-23
IESG Telechat date: Not scheduled for a telechat

Summary:

Major issues:

Minor issues:

Nits/editorial comments:

Some of the references refer to older revisions.  

Abbreviations:
* T-PE is referenced several times but not defined.
* d-CW is referenced in Figure 3 but not defined. 
* S-Label is referenced several times but not defined.


Figure 1 and 2 have the same label.

In Section 4.2:

* There is reference to section 5.1.1 and 5.1.2, but those sections 
do not exist in this draft.  Can you clarify which draft/RFC these
sections are referring to? 

* "Per [I-D.ietf-detnet-mpls], the DetNet MPLS data plane uses a single
   S-Label to support a single app flow.  Section 5.1.  DetNet IP Flow
   Identification Procedures ..."  

   Why is Section 5.1 referenced like this?

* "DetNet IP Flow Identification Procedures in [I-D.ietf-detnet-ip] states
   that a single DetNet flow is identified based on IP, and next level
   protocol, header information.  Section 4.4.  Aggregation..."  
   
   It would be more clear to specifically refer to the draft/rfc and section.