Last Call Review of draft-ietf-tram-turn-mobility-03
review-ietf-tram-turn-mobility-03-genart-lc-resnick-2016-08-08-00

Request Review of draft-ietf-tram-turn-mobility
Requested rev. no specific revision (document currently at 09)
Type Last Call Review
Team General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) (genart)
Deadline 2016-08-11
Requested 2016-07-28
Authors Tirumaleswar Reddy.K, Dan Wing, Prashanth Patil, Paal-Erik Martinsen
Draft last updated 2016-08-08
Completed reviews Genart Last Call review of -03 by Pete Resnick (diff)
Genart Telechat review of -08 by Pete Resnick (diff)
Secdir Last Call review of -02 by David Waltermire (diff)
Rtgdir Early review of -03 by Tony Przygienda (diff)
Assignment Reviewer Pete Resnick 
State Completed
Review review-ietf-tram-turn-mobility-03-genart-lc-resnick-2016-08-08
Reviewed rev. 03 (document currently at 09)
Review result Ready with Issues
Review completed: 2016-08-08

Review
review-ietf-tram-turn-mobility-03-genart-lc-resnick-2016-08-08

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at

<http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.

Document: draft-ietf-tram-turn-mobility-03
Reviewer: Pete Resnick
Review Date: 2016-08-08
IETF LC End Date: 2016-08-11
IESG Telechat date: Unknown

Summary: This draft is basically ready for publication, but has some 
minor issues and nits that should be fixed before publication.

Major issues:

None

Minor issues:

3.1.2 - Change "MUST" to "will" both times in the second paragraph. The 
last sentence of the section I don't understand; it doesn't seem to have 
any interoperability implications, and I don't see why the client can't 
examine the ticket in any way it wants. Either justify the sentence or 
delete it.

3.2.2 - Change "may" to "MAY" in the sixth paragraph. That *is* a 
protocol option being described there.

Nits/editorial comments:

3.1.4 - Change "MAY" to "can" in the second paragraph. I'd also split 
that sentence into two sentences as the first half has nothing to do 
with the second half.

3.2.1 - The last sentence of 3.2.1 is confusing until you read 3.2.2 and 
3.2.3. I would simply delete the sentence. I don't think it adds 
anything.

3.4 - Put the "TBD" in there so that the RFC Editor can update.

4 - Put a note to the RFC Editor here to update sections 3.1.4 and 3.4 
with the error number. That will make sure it gets updated properly.

pr
-- 
Pete Resnick <http://www.qualcomm.com/~presnick/>
Qualcomm Technologies, Inc. - +1 (858)651-4478