Telechat Review of draft-ietf-core-http-mapping-15
review-ietf-core-http-mapping-15-genart-telechat-dupont-2016-10-10-00

Request Review of draft-ietf-core-http-mapping
Requested rev. no specific revision (document currently at 17)
Type Telechat Review
Team General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) (genart)
Deadline 2016-10-11
Requested 2016-09-29
Authors Angelo Castellani, Salvatore Loreto, Akbar Rahman, Thomas Fossati, Esko Dijk
Draft last updated 2016-10-10
Completed reviews Genart Last Call review of -12 by Francis Dupont (diff)
Genart Telechat review of -14 by Francis Dupont (diff)
Genart Telechat review of -15 by Francis Dupont (diff)
Secdir Last Call review of -12 by Dacheng Zhang (diff)
Opsdir Last Call review of -12 by Menachem Dodge (diff)
Secdir Last Call review of -17 by Dacheng Zhang
Opsdir Telechat review of -17 by Susan Hares
Assignment Reviewer Francis Dupont
State Completed
Review review-ietf-core-http-mapping-15-genart-telechat-dupont-2016-10-10
Reviewed rev. 15 (document currently at 17)
Review result Ready
Review completed: 2016-10-10

Review
review-ietf-core-http-mapping-15-genart-telechat-dupont-2016-10-10

I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for this draft. The General Area
Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being processed
by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments just
like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at

<

http://wiki.tools.ietf.org/area/gen/trac/wiki/GenArtfaq>.

Document: draft-ietf-core-http-mapping-13.txt
Reviewer: Francis Dupont
Review Date: 20160829
IETF LC End Date: 20160822
IESG Telechat date: unknown

Summary: Ready

Major issues: None

Minor issues: None

Nits/editorial comments:
 - Abstract page 1: please expand the CoAP abbrev at first use.

 - ToC page 3 and 11 page 29: Acknowledgements -> Acknowledgments

 - 1 page 3: again please expand the CoAP abbrev at first use.

 - 3 page 6, 5.4.2 page 12, 5.5 page 13, and 7 note 4 page 22:
  i.e. -> i.e.,

 - 5.3 page 9 (twice), 5.4.2 page 12, 6.2 page 16, 6.2 page 17 (3 times),
   6.6 Fig 2 page 19, 7 note 7 page 22, 8.3 page 24, and 10.2 page 28:
  e.g. -> e.g.,

 - 5.4.1.1 page 10: IMHO the 1. Target CoAP URI ... should be on the
  next page (BTW leave this to the RFC Editor).

 - 5.4.2.1 page 12: same comment about "2. Target CoAP URI ..."

 - 5.4.2.1 page 13: perhaps a missing "on" at the end of:
  

http://p.example.com/hc/?s=coap&hp=s.example.com&p=/light&q=



Regards

Francis.Dupont at fdupont.fr