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Telechat Review of draft-ietf-grow-simple-va-
review-ietf-grow-simple-va-genart-telechat-shirazipour-2012-08-21-00

Request Review of draft-ietf-grow-simple-va
Requested revision No specific revision (document currently at 12)
Type Telechat Review
Team General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) (genart)
Deadline 2012-06-19
Requested 2012-06-07
Authors Robert Raszuk , Jakob Heitz , Alton Lo , Lixia Zhang , Xiaohu Xu
I-D last updated 2012-08-21
Completed reviews Genart Last Call review of -09 by Meral Shirazipour (diff)
Genart Telechat review of -?? by Meral Shirazipour
Assignment Reviewer Meral Shirazipour
State Completed
Request Telechat review on draft-ietf-grow-simple-va by General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) Assigned
Result Almost ready
Completed 2012-08-21
review-ietf-grow-simple-va-genart-telechat-shirazipour-2012-08-21-00
I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for draft-ietf-grow-simple-va-09.txt. For
background on Gen-ART, please see the FAQ at
 <http://www.alvestrand.no/ietf/gen/art/gen-art-FAQ.html>.



Please resolve these comments along with any other Last Call comments you may
receive.



Document: draft-ietf-grow-simple-va-09

Reviewer: Meral Shirazipour

Review Date: June-11-2012

IETF LC End Date: June-12-2012

IESG Telechat date: June-21-2012



Summary:

This draft is almost ready to be published as Informational RFC but I do have
some comments.



Minor issues:

-[Page 1], Abstract, not clear what is the simplification of S-VA in comparison
to VA. Suggestion: a sentence or two in the abstract could clarify this

"In contracts to VA, S-VA reduces operational complexity by ..."



Nits/editorial comments:

-Consistency: [Page 4], 2nd to last paragraph: "core routers, to ABRs", expand
"ABRs"-->"Area Border Routers (ABRs)"

-Consistency: [Page 4], 2nd to last paragraph: "to the ASBR routers", expand
"ASBR"-->"to AS Border Routers (ASBRs)"

-Typo: [Page 5], Section 1: "rather then"--> "rather than"

-Clarity: [Page 5], Section 1, same sentence as above typo, add commas after
"can" and "RIB":

"In configurations where BGP routes are used to resolve other routes

or where BGP routes are redistributed to other protocols which both

happen via RIB simple-va can[,] rather then suppressing routes before

they are installed in global RIB[,] flag them as "suppress eligible".

"

-Consistency: Perhaps run over draft and change all: "loc-RIB"-->"Loc-RIB"

-Consistency: Perhaps run over draft and change all: "simple-va"-->"S-VA"

-Clarity: [Page 6],"product of SPF"-->"product of Shortest Path First (SPF)"

-Clarity: [Page 6],Section 2, last paragraph: "scenarios for S-VA -
"-->"scenarios for S-VA : "

-Consistency: [Page 7], Figure should have a caption (and last paragraph p.7
should refer to Figure 1)

-Consistency: [Page 7]&[Page 8], spell out EP and EBGP when first use.

-Clarity: [Page 8] paragraph 1, "suppression routes"-->"suppression of all
routes"

-Clarity: [Page 8],last paragraph: "needs to pointed"-->"needs to be pointed"

-Typo: [Page 8],last sentence: "more then"-->"more than"

-Clarity: [Page 8][Page 9], point form after "the following solutions could be
considered:", it is not clear what is a title, what is the explanation.

Please correct this.(Suggestion, perhaps use ":" after the title, before the
explanation.)

-Typo: [Page 9], "etc .."--> "etc."





Thanks,

Meral



---

Meral Shirazipour

Ericsson

Research

www.ericsson.com