Last Call Review of draft-ietf-stox-7248bis-12

Request Review of draft-ietf-stox-7248bis
Requested rev. no specific revision (document currently at 14)
Type Last Call Review
Team General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) (genart)
Deadline 2016-11-01
Requested 2016-09-22
Authors Peter Saint-Andre
Draft last updated 2016-10-22
Completed reviews Genart Last Call review of -12 by Ralph Droms (diff)
Genart Telechat review of -13 by Ralph Droms (diff)
Opsdir Last Call review of -12 by Scott Bradner (diff)
Assignment Reviewer Ralph Droms
State Completed
Review review-ietf-stox-7248bis-12-genart-lc-droms-2016-10-22
Reviewed rev. 12 (document currently at 14)
Review result Ready
Review completed: 2016-10-22


I am the assigned Gen-ART reviewer for draft-ietf-stox-7248bis-12. The
General Area Review Team (Gen-ART) reviews all IETF documents being
processed by the IESG for the IETF Chair.  Please treat these comments
just like any other last call comments.

For more information, please see the FAQ at 


Document: draft-ietf-stox-7248bis-12
Reviewer: Ralph Droms
Review Date: 2016-10-21
IETF LC End Date:  2016-10-06
IESG Telechat date: 2016-11-03

Summary: Ready for publication as a Proposed Standard

I apologize for the late submission of this review.

I am not well-versed in either SIP or XMPP, so I could only give the
technical content of the document a cursory review.  I found no
issues to report in that review.

I'll make two small editorial suggestions:

1) There are possibly anachronistic references to "this series" of
documents.  The members of that "series" will be less obvious with the
publication of rfc7248bis.  It would likely be helpful to list the
members of the document series explicitly.

2) It might be useful to add a short section on the history of the
document, to give readers of this document an understanding of the
motivation for the publication of 7248bis.

- Ralph Droms