Telechat Review of draft-ietf-bess-evpn-virtual-eth-segment-13
review-ietf-bess-evpn-virtual-eth-segment-13-intdir-telechat-haberman-2023-09-06-00

I am an assigned INT directorate reviewer for
draft-ietf-bess-evpn-virtual-eth-segment. These comments were written primarily
for the benefit of the Internet Area Directors. Document editors and
shepherd(s) should treat these comments just like they would treat comments
from any other IETF contributors and resolve them along with any other Last
Call comments that have been received. For more details on the INT Directorate,
see https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/intdir/about/.

Major Issues:

Minor Issues:

* Section 1.2 talks about this document defining extensions for RFCs 7432 and
7623. Should this document formally update those RFCs?

* I am by no means an EVPN expert, so I am curious if there is additional
functionality needed to ensure consistency of ethernet-level configuration
options across the vES (e.g., Max Frame Size) given the mix of technologies
supported.

Nits:

* General
   - There are multiple instances of confusing sentence structure throughout
   the document. Highly recommend getting a native English speaker familiar
   with the technology to make an editorial pass through the document. - Are
   phrases such as "out-of-franchise customer sites" well-known in this
   community?

* Abstract
   - Using undefined acronyms in the Abstract is a bit confusing.
   - The second-half of the first sentence is difficult to parse.

* Introduction
   - The first sentence has the same parsing issues as the first sentence in
   the Abstract.