Last Call Review of draft-ietf-lpwan-schc-over-sigfox-16
review-ietf-lpwan-schc-over-sigfox-16-iotdir-lc-sarikaya-2022-12-13-00
review-ietf-lpwan-schc-over-sigfox-16-iotdir-lc-sarikaya-2022-12-13-00
MIME-Version: 1.0 Date: Mon, 12 Dec 2022 11:02:00 -0600 Reply-To: sarikaya@ieee.org Message-ID: <CAC8QAcd+k0f1dqnPYkmBBt9L19ATyhhxQAn6kXHXrorrVVWdtg@mail.gmail.com> Subject: IoT Draft Review Comments <draft-ietf-lpwan-schc-over-sigfox-16.txt> From: Behcet Sarikaya <sarikaya2012@gmail.com> To: iot-dir@ietf.org, draft-ietf-lpwan-schc-over-sigfox@ietf.org, "Eric Vyncke (evyncke)" <evyncke@cisco.com>, lp-wan <lp-wan@ietf.org>, lpwan-chairs@ietf.org Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="0000000000007c69df05efa47694" --0000000000007c69df05efa47694 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="UTF-8" I am the assigned IoT Directorate reviewer for this draft. The Directorate aims to review IETF documents related with IoT (Internet of Things). Please treat these comments just like any other last call comments. For more information, please see https://trac.ietf.org/trac/int/wiki/IOTDirWiki. https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/iotdir/about/ Document:draft-ietf-lpwan-schc-over-sigfox-16.txt Reviewer:Behcet Sarikaya Review Date:2022-12-12 IETF Review End Date:2022-12-1-20 IESG Telechat date: (if known) Summary: Major issues:None Minor issues:Yes Nits/editorial comments:Yes In Introduction Base Stations then forward messages to the Sigfox Cloud infrastructure for further processing and final delivery to the customer What about receiving from cloud? (technical coverage of the cloud could be improved) In 3.6.1.3.1 Section Section 3.7.1 Section Section 4.1 Many places afterwards same repeated Section references In Section 3.1 Figure 1 NGW is referenced as Network Gateway, Sigfox Network, cloud-based Sigfox Core Network suggest Network Gateway (NGW) Section 8.1 RFC 3967 says IETF procedures generally require that a standards track RFC may not have a normative reference to another standards track document at a lower maturity level or to a non standards track specification refers to SCHC Compound Ack reference? --0000000000007c69df05efa47694 Content-Type: text/html; charset="UTF-8" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable <div dir=3D"ltr"><p dir=3D"auto" style=3D"font-size:16px;box-sizing:border-= box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(36,41,47);font-family:-appl= e-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"Segoe UI","Noto Sans",Helv= etica,Arial,sans-serif,"Apple Color Emoji","Segoe UI Emoji&q= uot;">I am the assigned IoT Directorate reviewer for this draft. The Direct= orate aims to review IETF documents related with IoT (Internet of Things). = Please treat these comments just like any other last call comments.</p><p d= ir=3D"auto" style=3D"font-size:16px;box-sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;ma= rgin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(36,41,47);font-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSyst= emFont,"Segoe UI","Noto Sans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-seri= f,"Apple Color Emoji","Segoe UI Emoji"">For more inform= ation, please see</p><p dir=3D"auto" style=3D"font-size:16px;box-sizing:bor= der-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(36,41,47);font-family:-= apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"Segoe UI","Noto Sans",= Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,"Apple Color Emoji","Segoe UI Emo= ji""><a href=3D"https://trac.ietf.org/trac/int/wiki/IOTDirWiki" rel=3D= "nofollow" style=3D"box-sizing:border-box;text-decoration:none">https://tra= c.ietf.org/trac/int/wiki/IOTDirWiki</a>.<span class=3D"gmail-Apple-converte= d-space">=C2=A0</span><a href=3D"https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/iotdir/= about/" rel=3D"nofollow" style=3D"box-sizing:border-box;text-decoration:non= e">https://datatracker.ietf.org/group/iotdir/about/</a></p><p dir=3D"auto" = style=3D"font-size:16px;box-sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:= 16px;color:rgb(36,41,47);font-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"= ;Segoe UI","Noto Sans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,"Appl= e Color Emoji","Segoe UI Emoji"">Document:draft-ietf-lpwan-s= chc-over-sigfox-16.txt</p><p dir=3D"auto" style=3D"font-size:16px;box-sizin= g:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(36,41,47);font-fam= ily:-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"Segoe UI","Noto Sans&q= uot;,Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,"Apple Color Emoji","Segoe U= I Emoji"">Reviewer:Behcet Sarikaya</p><p dir=3D"auto" style=3D"font-si= ze:16px;box-sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(3= 6,41,47);font-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"Segoe UI",= "Noto Sans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,"Apple Color Emoji&qu= ot;,"Segoe UI Emoji"">Review Date:2022-12-12</p><p dir=3D"auto" s= tyle=3D"font-size:16px;box-sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:1= 6px;color:rgb(36,41,47);font-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"= Segoe UI","Noto Sans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,"Apple= Color Emoji","Segoe UI Emoji"">IETF Review End Date:2022-12= -1-20</p><p dir=3D"auto" style=3D"font-size:16px;box-sizing:border-box;marg= in-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(36,41,47);font-family:-apple-system= ,BlinkMacSystemFont,"Segoe UI","Noto Sans",Helvetica,Ar= ial,sans-serif,"Apple Color Emoji","Segoe UI Emoji"">IE= SG Telechat date: (if known)</p><p dir=3D"auto" style=3D"font-size:16px;box= -sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(36,41,47);fo= nt-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"Segoe UI","Noto = Sans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,"Apple Color Emoji","S= egoe UI Emoji"">Summary:</p><p dir=3D"auto" style=3D"font-size:16px;bo= x-sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(36,41,47);f= ont-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"Segoe UI","Noto= Sans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,"Apple Color Emoji","= Segoe UI Emoji"">Major issues:None</p><p dir=3D"auto" style=3D"font-si= ze:16px;box-sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(3= 6,41,47);font-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"Segoe UI",= "Noto Sans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,"Apple Color Emoji&qu= ot;,"Segoe UI Emoji"">Minor issues:Yes</p><p dir=3D"auto" style= =3D"font-size:16px;box-sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;= color:rgb(36,41,47);font-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"Sego= e UI","Noto Sans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,"Apple Col= or Emoji","Segoe UI Emoji"">Nits/editorial comments:Yes</p><= p style=3D"box-sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;color:rg= b(36,41,47);font-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"Segoe UI&quo= t;,"Noto Sans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,"Apple Color Emoji= ","Segoe UI Emoji""><span style=3D"font-family:"Courier= New";color:black">In Introduction</span></p><p class=3D"MsoNormal" st= yle=3D"margin:0in;font-size:medium;font-family:Calibri,sans-serif;color:rgb= (0,0,0)"><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;font-family:"Courier New""= >Base Stations then forward messages to the Sigfox</span><span class=3D"gma= il-Apple-converted-space" style=3D"font-family:"Courier New";font= -size:10pt">=C2=A0</span><span style=3D"font-family:"Courier New"= ;font-size:10pt">Cloud infrastructure for further processing and final deli= very to the</span><span class=3D"gmail-Apple-converted-space" style=3D"font= -family:"Courier New";font-size:10pt">=C2=A0</span><span style=3D= "font-family:"Courier New";font-size:10pt">customer</span></p><p = class=3D"MsoNormal" style=3D"margin:0in;font-size:medium;font-family:Calibr= i,sans-serif;color:rgb(0,0,0)"><span style=3D"font-family:"Courier New= ";font-size:10pt"><br></span></p><p class=3D"MsoNormal" style=3D"margi= n:0in;font-size:medium;color:rgb(0,0,0)"><span style=3D"font-size:10pt"><fo= nt face=3D"monospace">What about=C2=A0receiving=C2=A0from cloud? (technical= coverage of the cloud could be improved)</font></span></p><p style=3D"box-= sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(36,41,47);fon= t-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"Segoe UI","Noto S= ans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,"Apple Color Emoji","Se= goe UI Emoji""><span style=3D"font-family:"Courier New";colo= r:black">In 3.6.1.3.1=C2=A0</span></p><p style=3D"box-sizing:border-box;mar= gin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(36,41,47);font-family:-apple-syste= m,BlinkMacSystemFont,"Segoe UI","Noto Sans",Helvetica,A= rial,sans-serif,"Apple Color Emoji","Segoe UI Emoji""><= span style=3D"font-family:"Courier New";color:black">Section Sect= ion 3.7.1</span><br></p><p style=3D"box-sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;ma= rgin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(36,41,47);font-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSyst= emFont,"Segoe UI","Noto Sans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-seri= f,"Apple Color Emoji","Segoe UI Emoji""><span style=3D"= font-size:10pt;font-family:"Courier New";color:black">Section Sec= tion 4.1<span class=3D"gmail-Apple-converted-space">=C2=A0</span></span><sp= an style=3D"color:rgb(0,0,0);font-family:-webkit-standard;font-size:medium"= ></span><span style=3D"font-family:"Courier New";color:black"><br= ></span></p><p style=3D"box-sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:= 16px;color:rgb(36,41,47);font-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"= ;Segoe UI","Noto Sans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,"Appl= e Color Emoji","Segoe UI Emoji""><span style=3D"font-size:10= pt;font-family:"Courier New";color:black"><span class=3D"gmail-Ap= ple-converted-space">Many places afterwards same repeated Section reference= s</span></span></p><p style=3D"box-sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-= bottom:16px;color:rgb(36,41,47);font-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFon= t,"Segoe UI","Noto Sans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,&qu= ot;Apple Color Emoji","Segoe UI Emoji""><span style=3D"font-= size:10pt;font-family:"Courier New";color:black"><span class=3D"g= mail-Apple-converted-space">In Section 3.1</span></span></p><p style=3D"box= -sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(36,41,47);fo= nt-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"Segoe UI","Noto = Sans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,"Apple Color Emoji","S= egoe UI Emoji""><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;font-family:"Courie= r New";color:black"><span class=3D"gmail-Apple-converted-space">Figure= 1 NGW is referenced as Network Gateway, Sigfox Network, cloud-based Sigfox= Core Network</span></span></p><p style=3D"box-sizing:border-box;margin-top= :0px;margin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(36,41,47)"><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;= color:black"><span class=3D"gmail-Apple-converted-space"><font face=3D"mono= space">suggest Network Gateway (NGW)</font></span></span></p><p style=3D"bo= x-sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;color:rgb(36,41,47)">= <span style=3D"font-size:10pt;color:black"><span class=3D"gmail-Apple-conve= rted-space"><font face=3D"monospace">Section 8.1=C2=A0</font></span></span>= </p><p style=3D"box-sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px"><f= ont color=3D"#000000" face=3D"monospace" size=3D"2">RFC 3967 says=C2=A0</fo= nt><span style=3D"color:rgb(0,0,0)">IETF procedures generally require that = a standards track RFC may not</span></p><pre style=3D"color:rgb(0,0,0)"> = have a normative reference to another standards track document at a lower maturity level or to a non standards track specification</pre><pre= style=3D"color:rgb(0,0,0)">refers to SCHC Compound Ack reference?</pre><pr= e style=3D"color:rgb(0,0,0)"><br></pre><pre style=3D"color:rgb(0,0,0)"><br>= </pre><p style=3D"box-sizing:border-box;margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:16px;c= olor:rgb(36,41,47);font-family:-apple-system,BlinkMacSystemFont,"Segoe= UI","Noto Sans",Helvetica,Arial,sans-serif,"Apple Colo= r Emoji","Segoe UI Emoji""><span style=3D"font-size:10pt;fon= t-family:"Courier New";color:black"><span class=3D"gmail-Apple-co= nverted-space"><br></span></span></p></div> --0000000000007c69df05efa47694--